Albany New York H Pal

Ok, well my name is Tara and I'm 23. I live in Upstate NY, near Albany.  About 4 months ago I was told I had genital herpes. It was the most shocking and terrifying news I had ever received before. Talk about total shock! It started by with what I thought was a yeast infection, which I had gotten a few times in my life. As the days went on and the over counter medicines I kept using weren't working, I knew something else was wrong. But since I had been with my boyfriend for 4 months prior to that, an std NEVER had crossed my mind. I became increasingly swollen down below, so much that it felt like something was inside of me. I had horrible leg pains, headaches, constantly tired, and extremely painful sores. At first, being so naive I thought that my "yeast" infection was so bad, that it had caused my skin to split, little did I know though that they were in fact herpes ulcers.

About 3 weeks into the outbreak, I finally gave in and decided to go see my gynecologist. By that time the sores were almost completely healed and I was feeling good about that, thinking that the infection had finally gone away. My doctor reopened a sore (which was VERY painful) and sent it to the lab to see if the herpes virus was present, sure enough it was. When my doctor said that I may have had a herpes outbreak my first reaction was "what? No, I don't have herpes it was just a bad yeast infection". But about a week later because of a phone call, everything changed forever. Since then I have had 3 bad outbreaks and some small minor latent ones. I was put on some medicine, as well as creams which have seemed to help quite a bit. The thing that gets me the most frustrated during all of this is that I cannot understand how I had gone four months of having unprotected sex with my boyfriend, and never contracted it. However, I am aware that herpes can be in your system for years before your first initial outbreak but due to some very serious health problems I had the year before I am positive that he was the one who had given me the herpes. What also bothers me is he does not have outbreaks, and because of that he has less mental pain and a huge amount of difference in physical pain, and he does not understand why I am moody when Im having an outbreak or when I have down days when I start to think about my future.

Through all of this, I have had so much support from my closest friends who I trust completely with my secret. I have gone on several herpes chat lines and support groups and through talking with people who have this same problem has helped me so much. What has helped the most is giving advice and relating to people who are new to this and I try to encourage them to look on the bright side of life and to accept and keep smiling, even though it hurts inside. Im glad I found your website, and I look forward to talking to and helping people. - Contact Tara

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