Sexual Health Buzz

My name is Bek, I’m 16 and I have Genital Herpes. I lost my virginity at the age of 15, becoming sexually active is meant to a big journey in one’s life, some girls don’t become sexual active until after marriage, which I reckon is pretty awesome. I always wanted to wait until I was either married or in a serious relationship except I was unsure because I had never had a boyfriend before. I was ugly as a young girl; I was always the girl that the boys made fun of. Well because of that from year seven onwards I became aware of the appearance, I started to dye my hair, wearing tons of make up, eating healthy and exercising.

I’m currently in year ten; I have heaps of lovely and caring friends but only my closest friends are aware of that I have genital herpes. Losing my virginity was a life changing experience and a half. To fully understand the importance of the love that your friends have for you, you need to experience something that is unexpected and unwanted.

I was raised in a single mum household, my mum is tight when it comes to guys, and she has never said that I can not have a boyfriend but she gets weird when I mention anything about my friends that are guys. So guys and sex talk in my household does not happen. His name was Brad; his family’s holiday place is next to my family’s holiday place. It was the Christmas holidays 2008-2009, Brad was 20 and ok I recognize he was not the best looking guy in the world, but he was the first guy to look at me as a girl and not one of the boys. We became friends with benefits, then a few days after he asked me out. Brad was the first guy to ever say those words “will you go out with me”; he made me feel special and a guy who actually liked me.

Before Brad’s and my relationship became sexual, I was a virgin, never been fingered, given or received oral sex actually never had seen a real penis. It was a learning experience. I’m one of them exercise freaks, I wont have a good day unless I get at less one hour worth of exercise a day. Well ten months ago this was still the case; I would get up at 5 am and go for a jog along the beach which I have done for years, while me and Brad were together he would come with me. My jogs are the only times that I am alone from my sisters and mum. We would jog to make out couch which was an old couch which was dumped on a headland; it was so beautiful the outlook over the ocean.

Being a virgin meant new experience, the first time I performed oral sex on brad I throw up all over him, he told me it was normal not to enjoy performing oral sex for the first time. It is just it tasted and smelt so terrible. Brad was a lot older than me (five years) and he had been sexually active for years before me.

On the 26th January 2009 (Australian Day) at 5.30am Brad and I had sex after 5 days of going out with him. I didn’t really enjoy it, it kind of hurt, and it was not what I expected, and I thought it would be like what it is like on TV like screaming orgasms. While we were having sex he kept asking me “Bek are you sure you wanna do this?” “Do you want me to stop?” I thought he was being caring and loving but the reality was he was just trying to make sure that I was conceding to having sex with him. A few days previous he had told me about his last girlfriend she was the same age as me, the reason for them breaking up was because she got pregnant and her parents found out she was sleeping with a 20 year old, she was scared to face up to what she had done so she cried rape.

It was understandable why brad made me say any times had with him I was conceding to the sexual activities. But I wonder did he rape, this guy I barely know, and what I did know he displayed this kind of faulty play dishonest nature and a pushy feeling, looking back on this event I believe brad has it in him to forces a girl to perform sexual activities, well he did pressured and pressured into the sexual activities until I had gave in.

Anyways after we had sex, we got dressed, and as he pulled out his little note book as he said “thanks for the root”, I gave him a funny look along with a fake smile and said “what you doing”, as he reply my gut felt to ground as he said “just marking off another tally” that little note book was his tallies of how many girls he had rooted, he gives a rating out of 10 and a smiley face if he would re-root them or a sad face if he would not. I ask him if all I was another mark on his tally, he said “of course not I love you Bek”. Yeah for same reason I didn’t believe him.

Two weeks later I realize that something was wrong, my vagina was really itchy, and then the painful blisters came. I could not do any thing I was in so much pain. I had heard that some girls have an allergic reaction from the natural rubber latex and at first I thought that was what was wrong, I told me best friend that something was wrong, we started to look through a book called “Girl stuff – your full on guide to the teen years” by Kaz Cooke. In the STIs section as we read over every single type of sexually transmitted infections as soon as I started to read the info about Genital Herpes I knew it had it.

The day after I rang Brad, he claimed that I already had the virus and that I have passed it on to him. I know for a fact I didn’t have it before because I had never been sexually active before him. Then he did admit that yes he DID have herpes umm shows his inelegance level because herpes can not be cure nor is there a vaccine to prevent the virus. I went to the doctors and he conform that brad had infected me with herpes.

It has been ten months since I had caught the virus. I still have not have had another boyfriend but that is by choice I feel I have not found the right guy yet. But I have had sex with other guys but I always make sure it is safe and that they have been tested for any STIs. (see note below) The last ten months have been hell, the 26th of each month is torture I break down and seriously feel like I will be nothing but the girl with herpes. People have asked me if I could take it back would I? Truthfully I would not want to take back this big mistake that is because I have grown up so much; I believe that I will able to encourage other girls to love themselves and never do something that they do not want to do.

I use sex to make me feel better about myself, I still don’t enjoy sex, it feels good but I have not found that special guy who will make sex amazing. I believe sex is a personal choice; some girls may want to experience losing their virginity earlier than others. I have a low sense of self I use sex to make my self-esteem elevated. Every guy had I have had sex with I have regretted.

I do not tell people that I have the virus ‘Genital Herpes’. (see note below) At first when I first got infected with this STI, I thought it was no big deal I will go the doctors get the tablets and everything would be fixed. Well herpes is not easily fixed; herpes is a virus that if you catch you carry it with you for the rest of your life. I am one of those girls who can’t wait to be a mum. And having genital herpes I can not give birth naturally, so when I am older and i am pregnant I have to tell my doctor that I have herpes to avoid passing the virus on to my baby.

The mistakes that I have made I am going to carry with me for the rest of my life. I hope I will found that special guy who will love me even though I have a sexually transmitted virus. Herpes is very, very common, one in eight people have the virus and one in seven girls have it. So any body that does have any STIs should not be ashamed. I was ashamed, I thought because I have a STI I am a slut, but the truth is that anybody can catch a STI, I was unlucky and caught Herpes my first time. Do not make the same mistake, make sure you are safe and do not get pressured into having sex.

Hi. This story was sent in by a gal from Australia that wanted me to share her story with you. If you  have a story that you would like me to share you are welcome to contact me.

I just wanted to let those reading know that if you have genital herpes you can still have a healthy baby without having a C-section. Having herpes doesn’t automatically mean you will have to have a C-section. You can have a vaginal delivery and the baby can be safe. You just have to know your status and talk to your doctor about it by the time you find out that you are pregnant. Thanks!

I just wanted to add to this post that it is NOT ok to have sex w/somebody w/out telling them that you have the virus. You do have a moral obligation to sit down with them and have a talk about what it is that you have BEFORE you  have sex. Condoms are NOT 100% effective at preventing STDS. They have a right to listen to what you have to say. Be prepared to answer questions if they have any and remember it’s not just about YOUR situation. You should insist that they be tested too. In the end it’s either going to work itself out relationally or not. Remember, having herpes does not define who you are and it’s not the end of your sex life. Always be honest with your partners!

In April 2009 Jeannie May was nominated a ‘Women’s Health Hero’ for her work supporting people with herpes. Read about it here on the Our Bodies Ourselves website.

H Pals, Angels With a Wing :)

Australia H Pal

I got this lovely e-mail from Maddy today:

Hi Angela,

Thanks for your response. I tried to do this the nice way and get you to be the better person and change things of your own volition, but you have insisted you are right, when you are actually NOT. Perhaps Dynamiclear is paying you to continue this charade?

I am in a unique position where I am not involved in Choraphor, but I know what is going on in the company.

The true facts of the situation are that Choraphor withdrew their product from Dynamiclear some time ago and took them to court, in their home country of Australia, to prevent them using their name and WON. This is NOT a change of name and you have been misinformed. The court ruling was quite clear that Dynamiclear IS NO LONGER ALLOWED TO USE THE NAME OF CHORAPHOR IN ANY WAY.

I look forward to seeing your page change and to hearing from you.

Cheers,
Maddy

Here’s my response to pushy little Miss Maddy: BUZZ OFF!

You have a lot of nerve writing to me in such a rude fashion and telling me what to do with my web pages. SHAME ON YOU.

Dynamiclear (previously known as Choraphor) is not paying me to use the name Choraphor contrary to what you believe. I am Not directly employed nor do I work for Dynamiclear.

Obviously you do not know what an affiliate program is OR how an affiliate program works. If you had an inkling of a clue, you would not have been so RUDE to me in the first place. (Why you have contacted me and Not Dynamiclear about your issue with THEM is BEYOND civil comprehension.)

Fact is, I could care less about the lawsuit between Dynamiclear (formerly known as Choraphor) because to me.. Choraphor is Dynamiclear and vice versa. It’s like trying to tell me I can’t use the term Lemons OR Limes if that is the ingredient I have in front of me. I have to call it something else..no I do not have to call Dynamiclear Choraphor if I don’t want to and YOU my dear can’t make me!

I have been part of Dynamiclear’s affiliate program since back when they were called Choraphor. In fact, when I was alerted to the fact that their name was changing to Dynamiclear.. I thought GREAT.. more work for me.. when actually it’s not more work for me. I changed the words Choraphor to Dynamiclear. And you know what? I can do whatever the heck I want to with my web pages.

I think it’s pretty crystal clear that that perhaps Maddy is working for Choraphor and they are pissed off at me because I would not leave Dynamiclear’s Affiliate program to join Choraphor’s affiliate program. And I don’t have to join their affiliate program if I don’t want to. And I can do whatever I want to with my web pages. They are MY pages. They don’t belong to anybody but ME.

I can talk about Dynamiclear.
I can talk about Choraphor.
I can talk about Lemons.
I can talk about Limes.
I can talk about whatever I want to.
I can share my opinions.
I can share other people’s opinions.

If the courts told Dynamiclear that they are not allowed to use the term Choraphor then why are you writing to me? They are Dynamiclear and I am not. I am Angela and my site is www.yoshi2me.com – I write about stuff, I share information, I share my own personal experiences as well as the experiences of others. I don’t work for anybody. I am not employed by the pharmaceutical industry.

So really.. I am not interested in YOUR e-mails. I’m not interested in your shouting in ALL CAPS at me. If you don’t like something – tell somebody who gives a rats butt because I do NOT!

You can keep looking forward to me changing my page until the cows come home. Remember, it’s my site, my page, and YOU can’t tell me what to do with it – PERIOD!

For the rest of you…here is where you sign up for the Dynamiclear Affiliate program. This is perfect if you have a blog OR web site and you need help generating funds to pay for hosting costs, etc.

Scientists in Australia are one step closer to discovering a vaccine for the common sexually-transmitted infection, chlamydia. A team from Queensland University of Technology and Harvard Medical School has already identified proteins that are able to protect against chlamydia and plan to breed mice with these immune fighting cells.

These cells, known as T-cells will be specifically directed to protect against the mouse strain of chlamydia. In doing so, they’ll be able to learn about what is involved in protecting mice against chlamydia infection and then duplicate those responses with vaccines.

“We’ve been testing these proteins as part of animal trials…and we think we’ve got the answer. It is possible that within three to five years we’ll be finished the animal trials and be looking at clinical trials in humans,” said Professor Peter Timms, from QUT’s Institute of Health and Biomedical Innovation (IHBI).

With 3 million new cases per year, Chlamydia is the most commonly reported STI in the U.S., especially among teens and young adults. The infection can be particularly dangerous for women, as many experience few or no symptoms and are unaware of their infection. Left untreated, chlamydia can cause serious complications and irreversible damage, including infertility.

Talk about Sexually Transmitted Diseases

The trial of a much-anticipated new HIV vaccine was suspended last week, following a review by an independent monitoring board that deemed the vaccine ineffective. The suspension of the phase II clinical trial of Merck & Co.’s investigational HIV vaccine (V520), in development for a decade, marks a setback in the global effort to combat the worldwide HIV epidemic.

The trial, called STEP, was an international phase II “test of concept” trial in uninfected volunteers at high risk for acquiring HIV infection. It intended to test both whether the vaccine would help prevent the occurrence of new HIV infections as well as reduce the amount of virus in those who developed infection. The trial enrolled 3,000 HIV-negative volunteers from areas of North and South America, the Caribbean, and Australia between 18 and 45 years of age. A planned interim efficacy analysis conducted in approximately 1,500 volunteers revealed the disappointing results.

The vaccine did not prevent infection. In volunteers who received at least one dose of the three-dose vaccine series, 24 cases of HIV infection were observed in the 741 volunteers who received vaccine, while 21 cases of HIV infection were observed in the 762 participants in the placebo group. In the subgroup who had received at least two vaccinations and who were HIV negative for at least the first 12 weeks of the trial, 19 cases of HIV infection were observed in the 672 volunteers who received vaccine and 11 cases were observed in the 691 volunteers who received placebo. In addition, the vaccine did not reduce the amount of virus in the bloodstream of those who became infected; HIV RNA levels approximately 8 to 12 weeks after diagnosis of infection were similar in the vaccine and the placebo arms.

Though the results are disappointing, researchers have stated that there are many other trial vaccines currently being tested, as well as some that are soon to go into testing. This is promising, due to the fact that different vaccines stimulate different types of immunity. “It isn’t the end of the line,” said Mitchell Warren, executive director of the AIDS Vaccine Advocacy Coalition, a New York group advocating prevention. Merck’s data “aren’t the answers we wanted, but they will help improve our other vaccine candidates.”

This information brought to you by the American Social Health Association and presented strictly for educational purposes.