Sexual Health Buzz

I LOVE your site! Thank you for setting it up. Just to share with you my experience of treating my genital herpes outbreaks.

I have genital herpes and not being too keen on taking tablets when I had an outbreak decided to try tea-tree oil as an alternative treatment.

I mix a drop of tea-tree oil with about a 1cm squirt of palmers cocoa butter lotion. I first used the cocoa butter just because it was close at hand when I decided to try using tea-tree on the sore bits as I didn’t want to apply pure tea tree with it being quite potent!

As with your other contributors I found the cooling and tingling sensation an instant relief. Within a couple of days of applying the mixture a few times a day the symptoms disappear completely.

It is not always easy having genital herpes as you can feel that you are some how ‘tainted’ by it. I love your site as it allows ordinary people like me to share their experiences of the condition and that other people are in the same situation and still have fulfilling lives.

As other contributors have said – education is the key – so the more open we all are about discussing herpes and other STDs the more likely we are to lessen their spread.

Thanks again for your great work! ~ X

Read what others had to say about Tea Tree Oil

We have had issues with this guy running his True Cures scam. He is attempting to do and say all sorts of things that is not true about the herpes virus. On top of that.. not only is his information wrong but he is the biggest troubling-scam-artist troll I think I’ve ever ran into in the world of scams and too-good-to-be-true potions.

It turns out I am not the only one who has been attacked by this guy’s nonsense. This was sent to me today and I thought I would share it with all of you so that you are not sucked up into this guy’s hog wash brain child titled: True Cures.

Hello Angela,

I would like to commend you for banning Fen73 aka TrueCures. True Cures has been banned from the Kinesiology board, Racoon.com and Curezone.com.

Please click on the links for verification:
http://curezone.com/forums/fm.asp?i=1425659#i
http://racoon.com/cgi-bin/dcforum/dcboard.cgi

True Cures uses many handles such as Viszla 100, Fen73, Big Gay John,
Medusa, etc to post false testimonials and promote his business. He has several hubs but regularly go to other hubs to get clients.
http://hubpages.com/author/TrueCures/hot/

He has angered one of his clients and she has started a hub about him and posted testimonials from some of his other clients.
http://hubpages.com/hub/True-Cures—Con-Man–Fraud–Scam-Artist

A number of his clients have also posted on several sites about TrueCures.

Once again, Great job and please continue to upkeep the integrity and
standards of your site.

As always I want to reiterate to my readers that if it sounds too good to be true it probably is. One thing that you can do to arm yourself with information and the facts surrounded by whatever it is that ails you is to do your homework on the subject. If you do your homework and read up on the latest you will not need to take my word for it. You’ll be able to see a scam artist for what they are right off the bat.

I really like your site. Thanks for taking the time and effort to share your story and support others who are going through similar things.

I got diagnosed with herpes in June 2009. I’m Christian and I wanted something special with my husband and so had decided to wait till I got married before having sex.

Earlier this year I got engaged to my much older boyfriend (21yrs older than me!) and although he knew I wanted to wait, I ended up compromising because I loved him and we were planning to be married within a few months…or so I thought.

He never actually gave me a ring and I have seriously doubted his integrity and honor since then. We had discussed STD testing on numerous occasions – he said there was no way he could have anything. I told him he may be a symptomless carrier or that one of his partners may have had something. He said he wouldn’t sleep with anyone who had something like that…. I didn’t insist on him getting tested. I was doubly stupid…first for believing him and trusting him, second for not using a condom (he had had a vasectomy already, and I didn’t see the need to use a condom with my “husband” although we weren’t actually married yet).

We had sex. Once. And after a really bad episode of “thrush” I got the blister which then ulcerated. I found it hard to sit down and painful to walk as it rubbed with every step. Urinating was excruciating until my doctor suggested pouring water over my genitals while I urinated to dilute the acidity and reduce the sting.

It was a horrific ordeal for anyone to go through, but especially having waited so long for a “special” relationship (I was almost 31 when I lost my virginity!) The worst bit was that my fiance then confessed he had been in a 9mth relationship with a woman who had herpes – but she had assured him she knew when she was likely to be infective and wouldn’t sleep with him around that time. This was a bigger shock than getting an STD the first time I had sex.

My whole world crumbled around me. How could I trust this man who had placed so little value on me and chosen NOT to protect me when he could have done so – I had even said that I wouldn’t stop loving him just because he had something when we had discussed testing. It was a real betrayal. I refused to sign the prenuptial and the relationship ended.

I am still struggling to deal with everything. Although my friends and family have been amazingly supportive I still grieve for everything I threw away on a selfish liar. I find it really hard to forgive him for what he has done – the dishonesty and lack of love more than the std…if he had been open and honest we could have worked through everything else. I know I am better off not being stuck in a marriage to a man like that, but I just feel so desolate.

Purity was so important to me and now I will never have that specialness with anyone. Tainted forever. And to top it all off, it was bad sex – he did break me slowly but it wasn’t the loving passionate caring intimacy I had expected from my husband-to-be. So I feel doubly cheated out of the real deal! Trying not to wallow in self-pity but it is hard to see life beyond herpes at the moment.

Just when I think I am getting to grips with it all and starting to feel positive, I get overwhelmed by the loss and hopelessness of my situation. But although I feel like a leper, I have found nothing but love and support from everyone I’ve told (ironically, except from my fiance!!!)

Christians With Herpes

I apologize for the seemingly random contact, but I got your information from your organization and thought that you may be interested in and able to help me with a project that I am working on. I’m an Associate Producer with MTV Networks and am currently working on a documentary following young people who are suffering from herpes.

You may or may not be familiar with MTV’s True Life — it’s a long-running, award winning documentary series that seeks to have young people share their stories, in their own words. The format is strictly first person, which is to say that we don’t filter the voices of our subjects through narrators or any similar third parties. All we do is follow them; it’s our hope that by allowing these people to use their own voices to tell their stories, and communicating directly with their peers, we can impact the way people interact and engage with the world they live in.

One of the themes we’re currently exploring for this particular episode is what it is like to be a young person living with herpes. We are interested in finding people who are currently seeking treatments and are learning more about their condition each day. We realize that a number of young people are suffering from herpes and we would like to offer them the opportunity to tell their story in a documentary setting.

If this sounds like something that you might consider, I’d love to give you more information about this project — and if you know of anyone else it might be beneficial to contact, please do let us know. Our episodes can be viewed online at mtv.com. I can be reached via email at kristen.chalos(AT)mtvnmix(DOT)com or by phone at (212) 846-8850.

I really like your site. Thanks for taking the time and effort to share your story and support others who are going through similar things. ~ C

When people write into me with words of encouragement and praise it makes me believe even more that I did the right thing creating the site back in 2003.

My first and primary objective has always been to help people realize that these things do not have to define you. You do not have to limit yourself to dating only people that have the virus and you do not have to limit yourself to mixing it up with people who want to do nothing but hide behind the virus.

I’m not against herpes dating sites OR herpes social groups and/or events … BUT when those people want to encourage you to hide in shame instead of seizing the opportunity to discuss how this is such a small thing in life … then I have to question whether or not that site OR group is the right one for you.

You see … if you are using these “herpes” only situations as a crutch because you are afraid or you don’t know what to do with your diagnosis then that tells me even more that the last thing you want to do is to throw yourself into a herpes only situation. It’s just not going to be good for you … ya know?

Why do you think I list ALL types of dating web sites on my Herpes Dating page? It’s because I don’t want you to think that you have to limit yourself to dating only people that have herpes.

In the end you still have to have the talk. You still have to make a date to go and get tested. You still have to be willing to put those days of free love behind you. The fact of the matter is … it’s just not safe any more. It’s important to be responsible with your body and safe with your body.

I understand in the beginning of your diagnosis that you might be frightened and unsure of how to handle everything. That’s normal. But … if you have had this virus for years and you are still living and hiding in fear afraid of who is going to find out then I feel very sad for you. That is not how God intended your life to be. I refuse to believe that. You might think about getting some counseling OR asking yourself what it is that you are really afraid of because I don’t think it has anything to do with herpes.

Just a few thoughts I wanted to share with you. Something for you to think about and consider because I think it’s a sad day when you feel as if you have to limit your life. Life is too short for it to be limited … ya know?

My name is Bek, I’m 16 and I have Genital Herpes. I lost my virginity at the age of 15, becoming sexually active is meant to a big journey in one’s life, some girls don’t become sexual active until after marriage, which I reckon is pretty awesome. I always wanted to wait until I was either married or in a serious relationship except I was unsure because I had never had a boyfriend before. I was ugly as a young girl; I was always the girl that the boys made fun of. Well because of that from year seven onwards I became aware of the appearance, I started to dye my hair, wearing tons of make up, eating healthy and exercising.

I’m currently in year ten; I have heaps of lovely and caring friends but only my closest friends are aware of that I have genital herpes. Losing my virginity was a life changing experience and a half. To fully understand the importance of the love that your friends have for you, you need to experience something that is unexpected and unwanted.

I was raised in a single mum household, my mum is tight when it comes to guys, and she has never said that I can not have a boyfriend but she gets weird when I mention anything about my friends that are guys. So guys and sex talk in my household does not happen. His name was Brad; his family’s holiday place is next to my family’s holiday place. It was the Christmas holidays 2008-2009, Brad was 20 and ok I recognize he was not the best looking guy in the world, but he was the first guy to look at me as a girl and not one of the boys. We became friends with benefits, then a few days after he asked me out. Brad was the first guy to ever say those words “will you go out with me”; he made me feel special and a guy who actually liked me.

Before Brad’s and my relationship became sexual, I was a virgin, never been fingered, given or received oral sex actually never had seen a real penis. It was a learning experience. I’m one of them exercise freaks, I wont have a good day unless I get at less one hour worth of exercise a day. Well ten months ago this was still the case; I would get up at 5 am and go for a jog along the beach which I have done for years, while me and Brad were together he would come with me. My jogs are the only times that I am alone from my sisters and mum. We would jog to make out couch which was an old couch which was dumped on a headland; it was so beautiful the outlook over the ocean.

Being a virgin meant new experience, the first time I performed oral sex on brad I throw up all over him, he told me it was normal not to enjoy performing oral sex for the first time. It is just it tasted and smelt so terrible. Brad was a lot older than me (five years) and he had been sexually active for years before me.

On the 26th January 2009 (Australian Day) at 5.30am Brad and I had sex after 5 days of going out with him. I didn’t really enjoy it, it kind of hurt, and it was not what I expected, and I thought it would be like what it is like on TV like screaming orgasms. While we were having sex he kept asking me “Bek are you sure you wanna do this?” “Do you want me to stop?” I thought he was being caring and loving but the reality was he was just trying to make sure that I was conceding to having sex with him. A few days previous he had told me about his last girlfriend she was the same age as me, the reason for them breaking up was because she got pregnant and her parents found out she was sleeping with a 20 year old, she was scared to face up to what she had done so she cried rape.

It was understandable why brad made me say any times had with him I was conceding to the sexual activities. But I wonder did he rape, this guy I barely know, and what I did know he displayed this kind of faulty play dishonest nature and a pushy feeling, looking back on this event I believe brad has it in him to forces a girl to perform sexual activities, well he did pressured and pressured into the sexual activities until I had gave in.

Anyways after we had sex, we got dressed, and as he pulled out his little note book as he said “thanks for the root”, I gave him a funny look along with a fake smile and said “what you doing”, as he reply my gut felt to ground as he said “just marking off another tally” that little note book was his tallies of how many girls he had rooted, he gives a rating out of 10 and a smiley face if he would re-root them or a sad face if he would not. I ask him if all I was another mark on his tally, he said “of course not I love you Bek”. Yeah for same reason I didn’t believe him.

Two weeks later I realize that something was wrong, my vagina was really itchy, and then the painful blisters came. I could not do any thing I was in so much pain. I had heard that some girls have an allergic reaction from the natural rubber latex and at first I thought that was what was wrong, I told me best friend that something was wrong, we started to look through a book called “Girl stuff – your full on guide to the teen years” by Kaz Cooke. In the STIs section as we read over every single type of sexually transmitted infections as soon as I started to read the info about Genital Herpes I knew it had it.

The day after I rang Brad, he claimed that I already had the virus and that I have passed it on to him. I know for a fact I didn’t have it before because I had never been sexually active before him. Then he did admit that yes he DID have herpes umm shows his inelegance level because herpes can not be cure nor is there a vaccine to prevent the virus. I went to the doctors and he conform that brad had infected me with herpes.

It has been ten months since I had caught the virus. I still have not have had another boyfriend but that is by choice I feel I have not found the right guy yet. But I have had sex with other guys but I always make sure it is safe and that they have been tested for any STIs. (see note below) The last ten months have been hell, the 26th of each month is torture I break down and seriously feel like I will be nothing but the girl with herpes. People have asked me if I could take it back would I? Truthfully I would not want to take back this big mistake that is because I have grown up so much; I believe that I will able to encourage other girls to love themselves and never do something that they do not want to do.

I use sex to make me feel better about myself, I still don’t enjoy sex, it feels good but I have not found that special guy who will make sex amazing. I believe sex is a personal choice; some girls may want to experience losing their virginity earlier than others. I have a low sense of self I use sex to make my self-esteem elevated. Every guy had I have had sex with I have regretted.

I do not tell people that I have the virus ‘Genital Herpes’. (see note below) At first when I first got infected with this STI, I thought it was no big deal I will go the doctors get the tablets and everything would be fixed. Well herpes is not easily fixed; herpes is a virus that if you catch you carry it with you for the rest of your life. I am one of those girls who can’t wait to be a mum. And having genital herpes I can not give birth naturally, so when I am older and i am pregnant I have to tell my doctor that I have herpes to avoid passing the virus on to my baby.

The mistakes that I have made I am going to carry with me for the rest of my life. I hope I will found that special guy who will love me even though I have a sexually transmitted virus. Herpes is very, very common, one in eight people have the virus and one in seven girls have it. So any body that does have any STIs should not be ashamed. I was ashamed, I thought because I have a STI I am a slut, but the truth is that anybody can catch a STI, I was unlucky and caught Herpes my first time. Do not make the same mistake, make sure you are safe and do not get pressured into having sex.

Hi. This story was sent in by a gal from Australia that wanted me to share her story with you. If you  have a story that you would like me to share you are welcome to contact me.

I just wanted to let those reading know that if you have genital herpes you can still have a healthy baby without having a C-section. Having herpes doesn’t automatically mean you will have to have a C-section. You can have a vaginal delivery and the baby can be safe. You just have to know your status and talk to your doctor about it by the time you find out that you are pregnant. Thanks!

I just wanted to add to this post that it is NOT ok to have sex w/somebody w/out telling them that you have the virus. You do have a moral obligation to sit down with them and have a talk about what it is that you have BEFORE you  have sex. Condoms are NOT 100% effective at preventing STDS. They have a right to listen to what you have to say. Be prepared to answer questions if they have any and remember it’s not just about YOUR situation. You should insist that they be tested too. In the end it’s either going to work itself out relationally or not. Remember, having herpes does not define who you are and it’s not the end of your sex life. Always be honest with your partners!

Hello. My son who is 7 years old complained about having a sore finger. The next day he had small white blisters under the skin and as the day went on they started to turn red. I had the school nurse take a look at it and she said it was a blood blister… well being a mother you know what a blood blister looks like so I had his doctor look at it who also said it was a blood blister. Still not satisfied, I took him to the ER and was told it was staph infection. ????? I still couldn’t rest until I knew exactly what was wrong with my son so finally a dermatologist took one glance at it and told me that it was definitely Herpetic Whitlow. He took a sample to confirm his diagnosis. At least now we know that it was more serious than a blood blister and we were able to take care of it with the right medication.

More Herpes Whitlow Stories

Can you give your partner herpes by french kissing?

Yes and No.

Yes, it is possible to give your partner herpes by french kissing if you have oral herpes.

No, it is not possible to give your partner herpes by french kissing if you do not have oral herpes.

If you have a history of cold sores or fever blisters then it’s probably very likely that you have oral herpes. If you’re not sure then you should see your doctor for proper herpes testing.

These are the posts that you guys were most interested in last month.

Getting the H1N1 Vaccine?

I am having my doubts on the H1N1 vaccine. I don’t think our family will be participating in it this time. We are definitely going to get the regular flu shot.

You Are Beautiful Inside And Out

Positive and encouraging is what it’s all about. :]

The Bathroom And Herpes

This topic comes up A LOT.

I think the thing that people need to remember is that you are not going to contract herpes from a toilet seat. As far as sharing towels go – why would you share a towel with someone anyway?

I learned I was exposed to herpes last year. It has been very difficult dealing with the emotions concerning the impact to society as well as the social response. I have repeated to myself over and over again that I will not transmit to anyone; as such I have personally elected to remain without a husband and without sexual contact of any kind.

I am not innocent as some are who also share in the discomfort and in this experience with me. Shamefully I am guilty of sin, many times over, that led to this.

My biggest heartache is the fact that I am a carrier of a contagious disease, but as someone said before, I believe I learned something that until this came along- I had not learned by any other means and that was to fear the Lord.

I have desires just as anyone else, but the fear of the Lord and the sadness that fills my heart of compromising someone else’s health as mine was compromised, hurts me.

When I read that the Lord said that our bodies are his temple and that fornication was the only sin against the body, I began to respect the body of others–but not until I learned I was afflicted. I contracted my disease from my husband just before I married him. Needless to say I sinned.

The word helps me to see how important the body is to the Father. I know you ALL love the Lord as I do and perhaps even more than I. I am so glad that there are some of you who found a man or woman to share your life with. I left my husband, he and his entire family deceived me on several major issues and when confronted, their response was “who cares” it was so early in the marriage that I elected to leave. When I returned home to my family I went to get tested and that’s when I learned there was more. Thankfully I did not sin like that since then.

I am grateful to know that the Lord made provision for me to leave so long as I do not seek anyone else to marry. I think that the Lord is extraordinarily just and merciful.

Please, if you have not found a husband or wife to share your life with and you ask the Lord to bless you, he will. Our circumstances are not all the same as you have seen through the testimonies of others, God knows what is and what is not appropriate-he decides and he gives accordingly.

Remember that he loves you deeply and wants you to make good choices; choices that will help you inherit life forever with him. He loves you so profoundly. Just please understand that his kingdom is very different from the one that deceives the world and we are given the option to chose whom we will love, that we might give him our loyalty as the Righteous King is worthy!

If he were not God, he would not be able to punish anyone. I have not known of any statue or image on the planet that can see everything we do and correct us, not one.

~ Elisa

More Inspirational Stories
Christians With Herpes
More Herpes Information