Telling the right person
Posted on Thursday, December 4th, 2008 at 9:41 am
Hi. I want to share my story b/c when I was diagnosed w/herpes over a year ago I was devastated-depressed-the whole nine. The guy who gave it to me accused me of giving it to him and subsequently I ended our already dysfunctional relationship.
I was really afraid no guy that I would want would want me when he found out that I have H and I was paranoid about passing it on so not telling a lover was not an option.
So fast forward to 7 weeks ago when I met a great guy online. He is literally the sweetest man I have ever known but I was still afraid to tell him but after so many weeks of dating I was thinking he was wondering why I wasn’t having sex with him yet. So last night before we went out I told him.
I watched the news sink in on his face and he hugged and kissed me and told me he was sorry. He asked a couple of questions b/c he didn’t know anything about it, and that was it; we had a great time together (even though that night we couldn’t do it b/c i was having an outbreak).
So my advice to people afraid to tell is just make sure you’re telling the right person…who already really likes you and has proven they are not there just for sex in the first place.
One kinda-sorta good thing about having herpes is that it’s an A-hole Detector.
I suppose having something like this would definitely put your relationship to the test. That’s if people take the time to get to know their boyfriends and girlfriends before having sex with them.
True, unfortunately people either lie about their status or simply don’t know about getting tested specifically for herpes. This is why getting tested for herpes should be standard, not optional.
The A-hole Detector function of herpes is also good for when you only want Mr. and/or Ms. Right Now.
The lying and sweeping the issue under the rug has to stop. It’s wrong and not something that should ever be acceptable on any level.
I agree that herpes testing should be part of the routine STD testing process. You are signing to the choir here.. you do realize that, right?
Yes, I know I’m singing to the choir but the message bears repeating. Maybe singing it without instruments in the background might do the trick for people who still don’t know? Just joking :-)…kinda.
Oh absolutely the message is worth repeating because there are a lot of people out there that don’t realize that herpes testing isn’t part of the routine STD testing process. I’ve known that for years though which is why I say you are singing to the choir if your comment was meant in attempts to educate me. (I’ve been there done that). :-)
How long were you and this guy together before you first had sex, or have you had sex yet?
I absolutely love the A-hole detector idea. I knew there was a positive to being positive!
Its a shame that so many fall for that safe sex crap. Get a condom everything will be alright bullshit that the Left Wing Liberal sexpots push on kids today. But with that said i am sorry that you got a disease that is not curable, remember when you engage in sex and not “Making Love” to someone your not married to, well you got it!
I don’t think that contracting an STD is a punishment. I do believe that contracting an STD is something that can happen to anybody, even if you are married and having sex within that realm. I think that there are many people out there that are just not educated on the topic. They don’t even know that they have an STD.
Well I guessI have ADHD..what is the A-hole Test. A__s Hole..Isn”t it awazing how people confuse making Love and Sex. You can be Married and not Make Love..or ever know how safe your partner is..unless You Spend every minute with him. OR HER… I have a strange sex fetish,,seeing men in Baseball caps..I like to THINK they are a Thinking Cap. So I just know Wearing Hats on All Heads IS Smart…But Their is no guarantee..unlessyou want to Just LOOK At Porn and Do not Ask and Do not Tell. Do not touch..Do not trust. Wow Sex and MakiNG LOVE has become So complicated..I feel like laying back and pulling my cap down over my eyes….But I better Stay awake. Sleep alone with a face mask over my Face..Cause I sure not want to get the Swine flu from the SChool KIds that sleep on Bunkbeds 5 feet below me in my Apt/ CoMplex. However they have been spendig a lot of time out standing in long lines withs lot’s of other KIds..waiting for their Vacine. Who knows maybe I alreay got imunity from breathing small amouts of the virous though my Nose.LOL Smile.even if your A Hole HURTS. Just cover all your BASiS.and relax..LEARN TO MAKE LOVE TO YOURSELF> Or Just become a “Viewer” a MSN Window peeper.lol
What’s your point Bob?