Challenges make you stronger

I just wanted to say that I love your website, I wish that I would of seen it a few years ago when I was first diagnosed back in 1996. It really makes you feel that you are not a lone when you have such a great support system.  I feel as long as you are educated about herpes the more comfortable you will feel in your skin. Having family and or friends to confide in, anything that challenges you makes you stronger.

I had just gotten home from College and was in so much pain, I thought I was dying of something, I didn’t know what. The pain was so bad that I went to my ob gyn the next morning and got the test results back that I was positive. I used a condom with a guy I was seeing in College, but it seems that he wasn’t as faithful as I was.  I was a complete mess, I had none to talk to and it was hard for me to understand what exactly what was happening to me. I did as much research as I could, I got pamphlets at the Doctors office, and talked to a friend, but it was still a painful experience. At the time I wasn’t very internet savvy and had a hard time understanding.

I met my husband of five years when I was first diagnosed. I was so scared to meet, talk or touch anyone. But, I knew that I had to get on with my life some how so, I went out with a friend dancing and we exchanged numbers. We talked a few times on the phone, then, we finally went out on a date and it was love at first sight. We were together three months before we had sex, I felt so insecure and disgusting that I didn’t want anyone to touch me, let alone have sexual intercourse. I wasn’t sure when the right time was, do I just say hello, my name is Michelle and I have herpes…. or do I wait; do I say something and take the chance of loosing this person? My mind was racing on each date on what do I do? How do I say it? When is the right time? I didn’t bring anything up until we were in a position of talking about having sex. So, it came down to our special night and we both wanted to be together and I just broke down and told him that I had herpes and explained to him what the outcome of our having sex together would mean to him, the risk he would be taking if he was to be with me... we also talked about taking precautions... It was so wonderful finally telling him, it was like a heavy brick was off my shoulder. He looked at me and said that it didn’t matter what I had, that he still loved me. We didn’t have sex that night, I just cried and he held me in my arms. We decided that we would both get tested for everything and use a condom at all times.

Once I did tell him, I felt a big burden off my shoulder because I loved this person and didn’t want him to experience what I had gone through in the earlier months. Since that time, everything has been wonderful. We are careful when we have intercourse when I have breakouts, but for the most part, my breakouts are not that often about once or twice a year which is usually cause by being stressed out.

In this pregnancy I have been able to control to a degree.  I am now 9 months pregnant and I did have a break out in my first trimester and got on Valtrex ( I had lost my job in the beginning of the year and six months later my husband lost his job) I am now taking Valtrex everyday 2 weeks before my due date. I was very nervous at first about the pregnancy, breastfeeding, but after talking with my Doctor and getting education over the internet, especially your site, I feel very comfortable in the decision we made to get pregnant.  As of today I am going to be induced, my Doctor feels that if there are no breakouts thus far and she is position right that it is a good idea to induce. I am so glad that I took the time to research about being pregnant and having herpes because it has made it so much easier on both of us. Even though I am allowed to continue to have sex, my husband and I have decided to wait. Getting educated and asking questions and taking it upon my self to do research has made this so much easier.

Thank you for taking the time to get a wonderful website together and letting people share there stories! Your website has made a huge difference in the way I feel about going into labor, especially seeing your pictures made me realize that even though I have herpes, I can still have the chance to give a healthy life to my baby!

Thank you again,

Michelle J

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